very superstitious (i hope you're humming stevie wonder now)

i've been denying it for years, but...i'm pretty superstitious.  in strange ways, though.  i've never had a lucky charm or anything like that.  but i've always been sort of a "sign-seeker", i suppose.  in some ways, that's good, because i usually have a lot of faith that no matter what, things will "work out".  but in other ways, it's kind of ridiculous.

for example:  when i was a kid at a birthday party and they were handing out favors, i took what i was given.  if my best friend had one i liked better and wanted to trade me, i would refuse.  something in me  believed that it was the toy i was meant to have and i wasn't supposed to trade.  i would take the hand Fate had dealt me.

(a plastic toy!!)

i'm really not kidding.  i was a mystical little child.  (robin, this probably doesn't surprise you...)  ;)

but anyway.  i'm also superstitious about the ebb and flow of life.  if things have been going well for a while, i start to get suspicious.  today i was out playing with the boys, and we were having such a good day.  i was enjoying myself.  really.  it was so nice.

the weather was beautiful, and i had two adorable pajama-clad boys carrying around pink buckets to entertain me.  life just felt...good.

and then i had the thought that something else was coming.  i'm not trying to be pessimistic, but hey...we weren't put here to have an easy life.  you don't get stronger by floating along with the current.  my superstitious side is anticipating a trial in the nearish future.  i don't know what it will be, but i have a few things i do not want it to be.

(death.  pregnancy.  terminal illness.  a terrible accident.   you know.)

silas and desmond doing 'massages' with the rolling pin

as an aside, i was also very superstitious about my babies and sleeping.  i never wanted to talk about them taking good naps or sleeping through the night because i knew (KNEW) that they would sense my satisfaction and wake up immediately.

trust me.  it happened.

pizza stuffed mushrooms before si and sirius left on their road trip

and just so you know, the last thing silas said to me before he left for utah:

"don't read too much."

really, now.  have some faith in me.

;)